aSalaam uAlaikum my Stylish Sisters...
Insh'Allah you won't mind if I take a little detour with this post. In light of some recent events in the life of one of my closest friends and our sister in Islam I feel a bit superficial gabbing on about clothes or shoes or handbags.
Instead I want to talk about something that is much more important in life: real, true friendship. As Muslimahs we have the upper hand in this field, as a strong bond between us is actually something that is expected from us as Muslims. We have been commanded by Allah subhanahuwata'la to choose our friends wisely, and to hold on to those friendships tightly. Just as a man is instructed to choose his wife for her piety, so are we instructed to choose our friends:
'And hold fast, all of you together to the rope of Allah, and do not separate' (Noble Qu'ran 3:103)
We are told in the Qur'an that it is our responsibility to help protect eachother in times of need and that we are truly brothers (and sisters of course) so to treat eachother in this way.
'And the believers, men and women, are protecting friends of one another, they enjoin the right and forbid the wrong' (Noble Qu'ran 9:71)
'The believers are naught else than brothers. Therefore make peace between your brethren and observe your duty to Allah that ye may obtain mercy' (Noble Qu'ran 49:10)
I can clearly remember the excitement I felt when I first reverted to Islam and started meeting sisters in my area. I remember I had absolutely no doubt in my mind that these ladies would be wonderful, caring, loving, and loyal friends because they were Muslims, and this was expected of us.
And I can clearly remember the disappointment when I realized that this was far from the truth. I have had so many bad experiences with ladies who considered themselves good Muslims (and from the outside appeared to be such) who I later found out were backbiting me, lying to me, and in no unsure terms conning me.
So, alhamdulillah since my reversion those years ago, I am so grateful to have found in my life a few true friends, and we are more than friends, we are Sisters. We laugh together, cry together, have inside jokes and silly stories. We have celebrated eachother's triumphs, and suffered eachother's pain. We have given eachother advice, taken eachother's advice, and ignored eachother's advice. We have learned together and grown together and taught eachother so much about life.
So it is so hard for me to see one of these friends, one of our sisters going through a real crisis right now. For her privacy I will not name her name, nor will I tell her story but I will say this:
I love her for her strengths, but even more for her faults. I love her for her beauty, and even more for her blemishes. She has been there for me when I wanted to crawl into a hole and never come out, and insh'Allah I can be there for her as well. It is times like these that I wonder, why must we always judge eachother? Why must we pick at eachother's imperfections instead of pointing out to eachother's value? Instead of criticizing one another's weaknesses, why can't we extend a hand to help? I am far from perfect, I am sure I've hurt people's feelings in the past, and will probably do so in the future. But it is something I want to work on, and something I think we should all work on. We are an Ummah; a community, a hodge-podge of races and cultures, backgrounds and demographics, and we all have one thing in common and that is our love for Allah swt and RasoolAllah. So isn't that enough to bind us? Isn't that enough to connect us in a way that petty problems and silly arguments cannot undo?
I think it is. And insh'Allah you think it is. Because I love my name twinnie, and my du'a is with her that Allah swt will give her the strength to face these trials and she will know that He tests whom He loves the most.
And insh'Allah we can all remember this in the future, because after all...we are more than just friends...
We Are Sisters.
Ma'Salaama and Allah Ma'aku.
Fashionably Yours,
The Mujahada in Prada
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6 comments:
Masha'allah sis. Beautiful entry. Everything you said is so true. There are people that come into our lives for a reason, a season, or a lifetime. For me, there have been very few of the last. I was just recently thinking about a dear friend who I love as much as a blood sister. I'd do anything I could for her. I value her friendship so much. She has been an inspiration to me in so many ways, but especially in the deen. May Allah watch over her, keep her safe and healthy, and ease her burdens.
MashaAllah sis well said...We are not just friends we are sisters in Islam and should be there for one another whenever needed. I have very few close friends and habibti you and your name twinny are two of them...
to the "friend" dont want to mention her name...I love you sooo much habibti and I am here for you whenever you need me...you can call me anytime and I promise to you I will have an ear to listen. InshaAllah you will get through your hard times and prevail even stronger when you do...Ameen...remember I am not just a friend but I am a sister in Islam and that is the best friendship a girl could have.
Jazak Allah Keir for this post dedicated to a dear friend...May Allah reward you for this :) InshaAllah...Ameen
May we all remember to be friends in the truest sense of the word and love for each other what we love for ourselves. <3
Aminah
Assalamualaikum Habibti
Mashallah, I am so proud of you that you have made this very wise decision to show your compassion for this friend on your blog...to be able to deviate from the norms to tell someone very dear that while life goes on and you have your job, your family, your kids etc, she is still very much in the midst of it all...in your thoughts, in your work, in your life.
For the darling sister, Im a newbie in your life and in your circle of friends; I am yet to earn your trust but you will indeed find me trustworthy, loving, caring and compassionate. My words may not always be what you want to hear but I want them to produce results; to see change happen for you, because Allah has said that we need also take a proactive role in changing what needs to be changed and I am here to help sincerely and Subhanallah not to be nosey or looking for some thrilling drama; that is not me. Pardon me if I dont always quote these things correctly but you understand the point. I wish you Allah's Syifa for Allah is the Healer and there is no healer but Allah, keep close to good company so that you may hear our reminders about what Islam is all about and in that you will find your means to survive this hardship and I love you Fisabillah and I truly appreciate your friendship over this cyberspace and hope to make that connection one day in person Insyallah. Peace be Upon you my darling sister in Islam.
Sister thank you for those beautiful Quranic reminders Mashallah.
Two Thumbs up for you Habibti.
Sincerely, Nora
Bismillah wa salatu wa salam ala Rasool Allah.
MashaAllah a touching post,i second every word you have said.
To our dear friend you know who you are..i love you for the sake of Allah, Your an inspiration to us all, the hard work and dedication you take in doing your daily tasks...your a grt person.. i wish i could be nearer to you and hold you tight.
May Allah always be with you, make your life full of love, ease and happiness as well as best of health and well being. Allah humma salli ala Mohammed ameen.
We love you sis !! xx
Very well said sister. Beautiful post mashallah!
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